Forgiveness

Forgiveness. It’s probably the hardest action for me as a human to perform. You would think that since Christ was able to forgive me so freely that I’d be able to do it as well. But that’s just it, I was born sinful and therefore like my ability to do what is right, I have lost my ability to forgive.

A young girl who attended Virgin Tech and was killed the day of the shooting wrote in her very last journal entry, “When deep injury is done to us, we never recover until we forgive. Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future,” a simple statement yet such a difficult concept. When I do not forgive, feelings of guilt and anger remain within me and make it a challenge to go about my day. I want so desperately to go back in time and change what happened, but life is not performed that way.  I’ve realized over the years that when I finally do forgive, not only do I let go of those feelings of guilt and anger, but I’m able to continue on with my life, a life that is better than it was before.

Despite having learned that I need to forgive if I want to feel better, it’s not always that easy. I have a tendency to go back to my sinful ways and replay over and over again in my head what mistake I made or what that person said to me that hurt my feelings. The brain is a very powerful thing, but such a nuisance at the same time, that it always keeps us remembering our past, though I can say confidently that I would not be the person I am today without my past and am grateful for my past. However, I’m sure the devil uses our brains to his advantage as well. He weakens us in every way that he can. One of my weaknesses is forgiveness and he definitely uses it against me, but thank God for the power of the Holy Spirit who brings me back to the Good News that I am saved!

Things like faith, hope, forgiveness, love as we get older we try and make them so complicated, but really they’re so simple. So why is it that it takes so much for me to forgive? I have absolutely no idea besides blaming my human nature and the behaviors and actions I learned as a child. I guess the best way I can go about overcoming this obstacle is to continue to remember that just as Christ forgave me when He shed His blood for me, I must forgive also. I must pray for strength. I must remember that though this life can be disgusting, stressful, and just plain awful, it can also be funny, enjoyable, and just plain great and I as a Christian know that things do get better from here.

·         I am selfish and put my comfort and needs before someone else’s

·         I envy others who have what I do not

·         I seek out negative attention even when somebody clearly needs it more than I do

·         I don’t appreciate the things that I am given

·         I take advantage of people

·         Sometimes I slack off

·         I don’t handle situations well

·         I exaggerate

·         I lie

·         I gossip and make fun

·         I lust

·         I am slow to forgive

·         But quick to anger

·         I’m critical

·         I hurt others and myself

·         I don’t trust God like I should

·         I don’t obey or listen to what He has to say

·         I steal

·         I disobey my parents and other authority

·         I am a sinner

But I am forgiven!

Elizabeth, I forgive you!

(This is actually a letter that my counselor made me write to myself).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iv50xrsFNdU check this movie out...I cry every time.