"God is within her. She will not fail."

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

"Being rich in money and things doesn't last. Being rich in the Lord and people last forever."

Everyday I recite this quote and try and remind myself of its words. And everyday I try and convince myself that if God knew I needed another job or money, He would make sure I was provided for. But as a college student who's going to be in school an extra year because of a sucky poor life choice I made my freshman year, the youngest of three, stressed out makes okay money parents, car owner, on the verge of becoming a shopaholic, and suffers from chronic stress/anxiety/worry/depression/pain/pity-me syndrome (if you couldn't already tell I made that up. That's not a real disease). So...this combination is not a very good one. And you know I'm not some lazy hobo that sits on my butt all day. I got classes. I have homework. And more homework. And more homework. And you know I don't want to be a pathetic wallflower who has no fun like I was last year, but sometimes I just don't know when to say no to people and then later I regret going and hanging out at the mall instead of staying in my dorm working on homework, but really the only reason I worry about homework is because I want to do well in my classes, but I want to do well in my classes mostly because I want to keep my 3.0 so that I can keep my scholarship. Otherwise I'll have to take out more loans and add another 10 years on to paying them off and I'll being listening to my parents bitch (that's right I said bitch, that's how upset I am right now) about me getting a job and wasting their money and doing better in classes and paying for crap, but you know what, I really don't want to be dependent on my parents. I hate that I'm a spoiled brat that sometimes has to ask for money and usually gets it but would not know how to live without my parents. So you know after I try to remind myself of my dad's quote (yeah, that's right my dad said that) it's followed by a but and this long shpeel that I just gave.......and scene!
I think I'm done venting now.
Ahh...JJ you always know what to say...Remember God will love me for me.

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